17th Apr 2017

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    1. waking up
      in the middle of the night
      feeling an empty void in your chest
      you turn to your left side
      to your right side
      trying to numb the pain that's boiling your back
      your legs
      your arms
      turn left again
      check your phone
      put on a stupid background music
      trying to make your head shut up
      but it doesn't make it shut up
      it just makes it scream louder
      and you find yourself
      picturing him next to you
      his fingers pressed against your skin
      softly caressing it
      and he whispers
      'let's stay like this for a little longer
      i love you
      you make me feel safe
      you make me feel good'
      then you turn right again
      but he's gone
      and it's 3.03 a.m
      and you find out
      you're in love
      and the emptiness in your chest fades away
      your back doesn't hurt that much
      your legs
      your arms
      you turn left again
      you make him comeback
      and you whisper
      'i love you back
      i'll love you longer
      i'll love you best
      i'll love you until I can no longer see you
      touch you
      or feel you'

      - from the night I couldn't wait for 'me' to be 'us' again -

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